No Spanking Personals Please
Although I’m flattered by the idea that someone thought it would work, the comments here at Spanking Blog are not an appropriate place to post spanking personals. Accordingly, I’ve deleted one that said, in its entirety:
iwant to make relation with one
women who like be spanking
I trust my female readers will not be unduly distressed that I have failed to reproduce the accompanying email address?
My advice to spanking lovelorn guys: there are a startling number of women out there who want to be spanked and say they can’t find a man to do the job. The thing is, most of them aren’t going to want to meet you right away — that’s just too dangerous and freaky. So go and find yourself an online spanking community based around a bulletin board system (Spanking Classics is a good one) and participate on the boards. Be yourself, be fun and funny if you can pull it off, and above all, be honest about who you are. Keep at it (we are talking months, here) and before you know it, women who now know you and like you will start sending you friendly emails and IMs on totally innocuous subjects. What you do then is left as an exercise for the student. Trust me, you’ll be harvested.
I speak from (happy) experience here.
Yup, I harvested Spankboss and it wasn’t an easy job! LOL
Honestly, I had a great time getting to know him on the board and interacting with him until I felt comfortable enough to start emailing him. Which led to IM, long phone calls, and finally “the visit”. Now we’re living together and blissfully happy in spanko love. Yay!
It really is amazing how many women are out there looking for a man they can share their kink with but it’s like being a part of any other community – you’ve got to put yourself out there.
Spankboss and Bethie, you are so right about all the single women looking for a good man to spank them. They far outnumber the married people on all the DD boards I’m on. They outnumber the single *men* too! Good advice you gave to guys who are looking.
I’ve found that AFF and Alt.com work well for me. However, you have to live in a fairly large city to have a decent pool to select from. Yes! It is hard to find a good man to spank you but you have to be sooo very careful with anyone you connect with online.
The “community” thing is a little weird for some of us. I’d rather find people without having to become part of a community (never much liked “scenes”, whether music scenes or otherwise), but that seems pretty difficult…
I beg to differ on the need for a good spanking personal site. Spanking.com used to be wonderful until they started charging for their services. I met several very nice ladies thru their ‘free’ postings. Yes, we visited via e-mail for a bit, then met for coffee. A well attended forum to help discover others with a common interest is very important. It is not easy to find someone within a reasonable distance using chatrooms if you live in a sparsely populated area, even one as large as Colorado.
I didn’t mean to disrespect spanking personals, except to prohibit them in my blog comments. I know they work for some. But it’s a rough ride for those who are shy or skittish about rejection.
Never occured to me to look for a spanking love on the internet. With proper attitude, vanilla men make good kinksters too! Check out my blog and find out for yourself!
Amber, I have read your blog and it’s my opinion that you got very lucky. Also, you may be unusually persuasive.
I say this because in years of spank-blogging, I’ve seen dozens, or perhaps hundreds, of women singing the same sad tune: “I tried to get my vanilla man to spank me, and he wouldn’t / he called me a sicko / he tried but didn’t like it / he tried but then he lost interest / he tried but he wasn’t very good at it / he tried but then he swore he’d never do it again.”
Yours is the first story I’ve heard that starts with a vanilla man and has gone so well. Which made me wonder if maybe he was never as vanilla as you both thought he was.
Wow…this is a real eye opener. I had always thought that men far outnumbered women looking for a spanking relationship, so the search for a woman would probably be futile. Guess it’s time to stop being a lurker, if I want to be harvested!